Hair today, gone tomorrow

You know, I never loved my hair.

In fact, I was pretty sure I hated it until about four months ago when it started falling out.

In bunches.

In the shower, over the sink… on my pillow, in my food. My hair volume is about 50% of what it was earlier this year. I had my thyroid re-tested, miscellaneous bloodwork.. all normal. I eliminated common causes of hair loss, until I was left with one explanation…


It may have triggered my follicles to cease and desist. This equally pisses me off and makes for, yep, MORE STRESS.

Brace yourselves

Yes,  my actual head.

Notice anything BESIDES the thinning hair?

Like red prickly marks?

That was where my dermatologist shot 15 needles INTO MY HEAD.

Scalp to be exact.

I had no idea where he was going with the appointment when he asked, can I give you a steroid injection? To see if it helps your situation? To which I said, yes, whatever.. PLEASE FIX MY HAIR.

I kinda had a panic attack shortly after … I VAGUELY remembered him asking me to collect my hair in envelopes over the next week or two, then all of a sudden the injection (that I thought was going into my arm) was aimed at my head. Oh, and the best line yet…

“this may hurt a little…”

OMFG. It paled in comparison to the, oh, 1000 or so shots I endured during my active duty in infertility.    I’d sooner shoot an intramuscular needle into my flesh blindfolded than endure this torture.

He kept injecting and injecting all over my head. My eyes started to water when he proceeded to massage my scalp.

Then he smiled sent me on my way with my homework assignment and set up my next appointment.  I am forever changed.  And I have a headache.

The only thing scarier than this visit will be the bill when it comes in the mail.

Or if I go bald. (please noooooo)

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Idiot 101

I have off from work today, so trying to take advantage of the day alone to house clean and prep for Thanksgiving.

It’s also one of those comical days that could easily be made into some funny yet god-awful Will Ferrell movie.

Take, for instance, my attempt to show the classy side of Shelli… and instead of just whipping out a wrinkly tablecloth to put on the Thanksgiving table, I decided to IRON the tablecloth. AND the napkins. Oh yes people, I spare no expense on turkey day… it’s all first class around here. So as I am ironing an incredibly LONG tablecloth my cat decides that as I iron and push the fabric to the other side of the ironing board, he is busy making it into his bed. You would imagine my surprise after I declared “I’m done!” only to look on the other side and see my cat clawing into said tablecloth. Ugh. As I pull him off, his claws take fabric with him and he’s in full sprint down the stairs with a tablecloth dragging behind him.

Yes, thank goodness I have a backup tablecloth.

Next, a trip to Starbucks to buy some Christmas Blend coffee (thank you Starbucks, for using the word “Christmas” and not changing it to “Holiday”). This blend is my favorite coffee, and the only time of year I clean up the actual coffeepot (I usually use my one-cup Keurig). So, I buy a pound and decide to get a Gingerbread Latte, but the barista must have gone foam-crazy… as I exit, I squeezed the cup lightly to hold the door for someone, and SPLAT… foam shot out of the cup and onto my shirt and chin. I HATE when that happens! Not to mention I looked like a fool.

As I am driving to another errand, yet another OMG moment… our main road in town is currently getting paved, so traffic has been horrendous with lanes being blocked off. Why they insist on doing major roadwork on the DAY BEFORE the day of Thanksgiving is beyond me. So, my side of the road is reduced to one lane (normally two lanes on each side separated by a divide). Imagine my surprise when I spy an old woman DRIVING IN FRONT of a steam roller in the CLOSED lane making tire tracks on brand new asphalt. Workers were waving at her frantically to stop and get out of the lane. What did she do???

She slowed down and waved back at them.

Aaaaahhhh, the fun has just begun. Just wait until the hi-jinks as I prepare Thanksgiving Dinner on Thursday.

This Thanksgiving, I am thankful that I still have my humor, and that even though I had some close calls today, I am still not as big as an idiot as that woman driving on freshly poured asphalt.

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You HAD to pick a fight, didn’t you?

First it was the Octuplet story that got my blood a’boilin. Although I didn’t post about it here, most of you know how I felt about that circus via comments to others blogs. That doctor should have his license pulled, and the media given a slap on the hand for their reporting of the story. I didn’t feel so much anger for Ms. Suleman, but rather feeling angry that others didn’t put the breaks on her ill-conceived (no pun intended) plans.

But now.

Oh, hold me back. I just finished reading a post on Mom Logic that sent me over the edge. In fact, it so made me angry that I had to sleep on this post otherwise you all would be trying to decipher my comments between a litany of four-letter words. Not to say I won’t use a few here, so be forewarned…

GINA (guest blogger), bless her heart, is probably the meanest Pro-Life advocate to ever walk the earth.

I respect women’s right to choose, but I have little tolerance for pro-choicers
who expect sympathy when they have a miscarriage.

Oh really, Gina?

If you believe that pregnancy doesn’t produce a baby until some magic
number (13 weeks? 20 weeks? 40?), then you must also agree that it’s ridiculous
to break down in hysterics, set up a memorial website for your “angel,” and seek
out a grief counselor when you start bleeding in your first trimester. After
all, you’re simply talking about the loss of a conglomeration of microscopic
cells, right?! That’s hardly something to cry about.

Oh, no, please SAY YOU DID NOT GO THERE Gina…

Advocate all you want, but don’t come crying to me when your hypocrisy hits
you like a ton of bricks. If you are going to defend the right to abort babies,
you don’t have the right to be upset when yours dies.

Ok, now I’m pissed. Are you fucking saying that I deserved five miscarriages????

First, before I go all nuclear on Gina’s ass… let me say a few things so you all know where I am coming from:

I am Pro-Choice. I do not dislike people who are Pro-Life. In fact, I have respect for anyone who can stand by a belief. Our views are uniquely our own, and we have the right to defend them.

However…. BEING Pro-Choice DOES NOT mean someone is PRO-ABORTION!

Pro-Choice means I don’t want the government in my fucking business. It has nothing to do with abortion. Two totally different things, Gina.

Gina, have you ever had a loss? Something tells me that you haven’t. It is a soul-crushing event. And regardless of political views, I have empathy and compassion for ANYONE that experiences a loss. The fact that you DON’T tells me one thing… you are a very misguided and evil woman. Actually, you might even be a man for all I know. I just can’t fathom someone writing such bullshit.

And, Mom Logic, despite your “disclaimer” at the beginning of the post, I am disappointed in you as a website. Clearly, there is a line where free speech crosses into hurtful vitriol. Something tells me that Gina being let loose is merely a tactic for page hits. Shameful.


Last, Gina, a few parting words… You may think my views are wrong, but at the heart of it, I am Mom and an Infertile. I have a living, beautiful son. I have had FIVE dead babies, each which I mourned and cried for. I have compassion. Therefore, I respectfully disagree with your rant, and hope that YOU NEVER experience a loss. Maybe then you will change your tune and not be so goddamn ignorant.

Gina, you have taken on a portion of the Internet that is much more unforgiving than I.

You better be ready for the backlash. You’ll finally get your 15 minutes of fame I know you’ve been waiting for all your life.

And it ain’t gonna be pretty.