Christmas Wrap

I can’t let the year finish without the obligatory Post-Christmas post. I guess I am off my game this year, because I really don’t have many pictures. Damn!  I was busy taking some video, and left the picture taking to S., and well… that didn’t work out so great.

Truth be told, it’s no secret that I’ve had a Nikon camera on my wish list for years now, and thanks to “the-expenses-I-care-not-to-talk-about” it’s hard to justify buying it.  Just me and my crappy camera for now.

We did have a nice holiday.  All the snow melted from earlier in the week thanks to a drenching downpour Christmas Day, which gives a good excuse to DO NOTHING.  I spent the entire weekend in the house with David and husband, building Legos, and playing video games.  I am now a resident expert of Lego Rock Band for Nintendo DS.  Yes I AM. And proud of it.

This week, while I’ve been working like a crazed lunatic, S. and David have been having fun.  Lots of fun.    Not that I am missing it all (well, I sort of am) but I am a wee bit jealous.

While I am hip-deep in my financial reporting and firedrills for work, they have been embracing some serious 1×1 male bonding time.  And for the first time in recorded history, they are grocery shopping for me.  ALONE.  God help me.

As New Years Eve looms tomorrow, I had thought about posting my annual why the year sucked bad post.  But that’s getting repetitve. 

I’ve got a lot of bitching to do but not in the mood to do it.

In fact, I have a lot of emotions to share with you all, but I don’t want to pay it lip-service.  For now, I am enjoying having my boys (the big and little one) home with me. 

I just can’t drag myself into that dark place right now.  Next week, when work calms down, I have a few items on my to-do list.

This year will be the year of healing.

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Funny Girl

Who watches Glee? Is Sue Sylvester not the most evil incarnation of an antagonist you’ve ever watched on a TV show? I love the dark humor, almost as much as I loved the rendition of “Don’t Rain on my Parade” this week. I think I liked it just as much as when Streisand sang it!!

Pure genius I tell you…

And for those wondering, NO, I am not abandoning my blog. Shifting focus, maybe, but not disappearing. If you dislike my vain attempts at humor, you may want to bail now. At the core of it all, I revert to laughter in times of uncertainty and I do plan on laughing again.  Just as soon as I stop crying.

I do.

I also have my posse of infertile friends to keep me busy obsessing about their cycles (now that I don’t have my own to think about). I’ve got my buds about to become mommies for the first time. Surely you want my unsolicted advice on teething and swaddling, right? And lastly, but not leastly… the rest of you… My  Super-Duper Band of Sisters and Supporters. You’ve always been there for me, I continue to be there for you.

I end with something I haven’t done a lot of lately. Picture time! as we approach the season of many holidays.  Sigh…  this could be the last one with Santa before he’s tarnished.  lol.

See?  I’m laughing!

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Gratitude

I have a lot to say, but just don’t have the energy to put it into words right now.  That day is coming soon though…  just not today.   Don’t worry, I’m not abandoning my blog.  Just waiting for the inspiration to move me.

I am writing today to offer up a heartfelt “thank you” to my brother and sister-in-law. Yesterday was a special day for our families. My brand new niece was baptized yesterday, and S. and I were the Godparents. You might be thinking that it was a bittersweet day for S. and I under the circumstances, but you couldn’t be more wrong.

It was, in fact, the most beautiful day…. and I found myself smiling ear to ear all the way through it. It means the world to me that we were able to be active participants in such an important milestone.

Thank you K.   Thank you for your unwaivering support and always holding out your hand to me. It has not been easy to be related to me.  I have far too much baggage, and most sane people would have given up on me by now.  My self-preservation mode has often found me isolating myself, and there are such rare moments when I don’t feel like the stranger looking from the outside in.  You have always managed to make me feel included and wanted, and never a stranger.  That is a feat unto itself.

Having a day like yesterday makes me feel human again. It was the closest I’ve felt to being “me” again in a long time.

It was the best day.

Thank you.

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Trivialities

It’s Friday, and I’ve had a long week at work, so forgive me for these most random thoughts.

I don’t know if I mentioned it here (I did a few weeks ago over here), but I started W.eight W.atchers again. I cashed in on my head start (being sick after the holiday), and went into serious detox mode. Lost 5 pounds on my own, and another 8 since. My quick goal before starting my DE cycle was to drop as much weight as I could, and basically get myself to a healthier place.

To my surprise, I’ve been hanging in there. And after two weeks of hard-core detoxing, I must report I am feeling wonderful. My energy is back again! It’s as is I flipped a light switch. Who knew? It was just the right time, and the right place of mind for me to do this. I am eating foods I never would have touched before. It seems a radical approach, BUT it is working for me right now.

David is having a great time @ basketball. The first practice was, well, hard for him. He seriously needed some help dribbling. But one basketball purchase later from T.arget, (and some practice time in with his Mom the “former teen basketball queen”), he is doing a lot better and loving the game. He especially loves the warm-ups (as evidenced to the right>>>>)

Also, I’ve been obsessing over something that is driving me crazy lately, and it has nothing to do with infertility (surprise!). It’s my anonymity as a blogger. I am slowly coming to grips that some people might find me on the web whether I want them to or not. Either that or I need to drop every social networking tool. lol. Check out my latest post on New Jersey Moms Blog )and you’ll read what I’m talking about.

Last but not least, next week I should hear something (in the form of a schedule) from the RE on the donor. She has an appointment on Tuesday to get the ball rolling.

That’s it from here! Have a great weekend friends!