Miserable Monday

Today has just been one of those Mondays.

David returned to school from his Spring Break, and at 7:30am I sat down in my office to get productive. Well, the joke was on me. I couldn’t access my work network. Seems my company downloaded code (this is where I remind you I work for a technology company) that blew up my VPN network (which just means I can’t get into anything!)

Four hours later on the phone with my company’s tech support (I use that term loosely), I finally worked out the problem that chewed up half of my day. Once I logged in, it was as if the floodgates opened with problems.

Work is killing me again.

The only thing I like about it anymore is that I work from home. But recently, The Company (sounds so, Heroes…. doesn’t it?) took away the option for me to expense my cable and phone. It’s a squeeze play to get employees back into offices. Like I am sure that makes more sense to pay for REAL ESTATE instead of my $50 cable, but whatev…

Not only that but I’ve been busy documenting my job upon request of management.

Do you smell something fishy here?

On top of all of this, S. is about to lose his job. He works for The A.merican Aut.o Manu.facturer that is about to go under. His management was let go last week. We are counting the days.

I am terrified to lose both of our incomes.

My upbeat attitude went from WAY UP HERE to the bottom of the bucket now that the sh!t is hitting the fan. I hate to be worried, but it is all-consuming lately.

Did I mention I just got another bill from “deadbeat donor”? Was unexpected (I thought I paid to get her out of my head forever, but I was smacked with one more reminder of failure.)


Just one of those days.

Miley Cyrus, The Apocalypse, and the End of Infertility

You know the apocalypse is upon us when I say “Miley Cyrus” and “I cried” in the same sentence.

Are you ready?… I cannot stop crying when I hear that new song, “The Climb” from the overrated teen queen, Miley Cyrus.

You haven’t heard it?? I defy any infertile to hear the song and not feel the need to shed a tear or two. Or a hundred.

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I’m gonna to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

Thank you Miley.

Speaking of celebrities (loosely), I also want to talk about Trista Sutter. Oh, you remember Trista, right? The Bachelorette that actually got married. I like her. She seems like a smart girl.

Anyway, let us dig deep into the BagMomma archives to a post I wrote several years ago, when Trista was talking about her two-year battle with infertility and how the Ov.Wa.tch. helped her get pregnant with her first child.

Then came child #2, soon after (wow, lucky dog!). And now, she’s gettin’ cozy with another company… (I hope she’s getting paid) but this time she’s AVOIDING pregnancy.

This got me to thinking. If you’ve battled infertility at all in your lifetime, and achieved your dream (whether it be 1, 2, or 10 children)… how comfortable would you be jumping into permanent birth control?

Does an infertile ever do that? Really???

I may be way off base, but I am thinking that anyone that’s been though a very hard time conceiving wouldn’t exactly be running to their OB/GYN to avoid pregnancy. I think I’d sooner jump bare-assed out of a plane with a poorly-packed parachute than do that. Maybe it’s because I am not done yet, and the thought of any woman willingly cutting off their reproductive ability is directly mocking me.

Joking of course. Ok, not really.

Look, I don’t disagree with it… I just find it…. odd.

If it were me making this decision (lol, like I EVER! will have to) I’d feel like I was playing with the devil. And the minute I really cut things off (so to speak) something would happen and I’d regret it. OR, the Gods (much in the same way they’ve been torturing me for all these years) would mock my smugness and impart bad juju to my family.

What say you, internet?

I know you all have got to have a lot of opinions on this.

Responsible family planning for infertile graduates, or the equivalent of 10 broken mirrors (70 years of bad luck)?

Don’t try to pull one on me today

I don’t think I’ve ever pulled an April Fool’s joke on anyone, ever in my lifetime. Really.

But over the years, my gullible nature has made me fall prey to all sorts of tricks. My husband is the number one offender. He LOVES to pick on me. Most of the time it’s because I am not aware that it even is April 1st until he plays some sort of lame joke and has his jollies. After which I smack him on the arm… “Hooooney! Please don’t do that to me!”

I think he secretly loves it.

So, my awareness of April 1st today is on my mind front and center. I have my appointment to pick another donor today. Let’s think about the coincidence of today being the day, shall we? Do you think it’s a good or bad omen?

Oh, and for those of you glued to your TV’s yesterday in anticipation of seeing my face plastered on GMA…. well, the bloggers were cut out for the most part except for one of my fellow writers. If you missed it, you can see the segment here.

Did you hear about this computer worm story? I think that’s all it will amount to be…a story. Every once in awhile some mega-virus is looming, and nothing ever happens. Working in the field of technology, I can assure you that my company isn’t very worried about it. So neither am I.

Lastly, I’ve finally given in to peer pressure and started reading the “Twilight” series of books. I’m halfway through book one, and still not seeing what all the rage is about. However, I wanted to read the books BEFORE I see the movie.

Movies always tend to ruin good books don’t they?

Petulant Monday

Some random and totally unconnected thoughts for this Monday.
Are you ready? I am about to do a little ranting.

The Mortgage Mess
No, I’m not going all political on you. Well, maybe a little. I just have to get this off my chest.

Husband and I are refinancing our mortgage. Mainly because (hello!) rates are freaking low, AND we have a home equity loan (used for the infertility medical expenses) which carries a pretty hefty payment. Responsible citizens that we are, we are restructuring our loans because it makes financial sense.

So, I am watching a news show last night, curiously… about The Mortgage Mess. Perhaps you saw it too. Anyway, I am watching this show with my husband, and my blood starts to boil. This show features a few families “caught up in the housing meltdown”, now destitute with their homes foreclosed. They are all playing the victim… THE MORTGAGE COMPANIES failed ME they say. THEY APPROVED ME FOR A LOAN I could NEVER AFFORD they say. I DIDN’T READ the LOAN paperwork, they say. The GOVERNMENT OWES ME, they say.

And I hit the roof. I am so freaking tired of people putting their mistakes on the backs of others. Anyone heard of PERSONAL responsibility? Do these people NOT have a family budget? If you clear $1,600 a MONTH in salary and were approved for a mortgage of $2,400 a month do you not have the brain cells to DO THE MATH???

And now, begins the bailout of these people who have NO RIGHT to be bailed out. And who pays for these folks making bad decisions? ME. I might as well stand out on the sidewalk in front of my house and hand out $100 bills. I am so incensed.

Way to teach your children the fine art of blaming others, my fellow citizens…. ! Way. to. go.

The Annoying Soccer Moms
If I need to overhear one more conversation between ungrateful Moms complaining about their kids, I am just going to lose it. I was hoping a random soccer ball would fly up and knock some perspective into their small heads. The have no idea how fucking lucky they are.

…ok, rants done. Ooooh, I feel better.

The End of the World
I live between two major Air Force Bases. My house isn’t on a direct flight path for the commercial jets so it’s unusual to hear air traffic ’round these parts. When we do, it’s military planes and helicopters. But not often. To me, they are distinct because they are so LOUD. Anyway, all weekend, there’s been something going on in the skies above my town. Specifically, the last two nights I thought The War of the Worlds was outside my window. Do military planes do training at night? I swear it’s so bizarre.

I know one of my blogging friends who have significant others in the military might offer up a comment on this. Please do… is it Training Week or something? Or should I be looking out for giant Octopus looking creatures? lol.