Foot in Mouth

It’s Monday and I am feeling a little under the weather.

I can’t tell if it’s a cold coming on, or just my sinuses acting up, but I have an itchy throat and the worst sinus pressure. Waking up with a headache is the WORST! Truly. This morning I have a dentist appointment. Just a cleaning, but I am afraid with my head/throat issues it might be a challenge.

Speaking of challenges, I had the most awkward conversation with one of the moms at David’s school today. She is a nice person, very pregnant. Apparently about to give birth, since she basically just walked in to hangup her son’s swimming backpack and just started going off about her scheduled c-section planned for Wednesday. I was courteous, and let her vent, until this exchange happened:

She says: “I am so ready to have this birth over and done with. I told my OB I wanted my c-section TWO weeks ago. I’m a teacher, and my husband and I planned this very carefully so I could have this baby and finish my maternity leave over the summer. Now it’s going to run into September, and it just annoys the crap out of me. I did not plan it this way.”

I said (yep, I did): “I would give up anything to be as fortunate as you. I never planned on infertility.”

And I walked away. She didn’t follow, just kinda stood in silence. I can’t believe those words came out that way, but I felt empowered just by owning them when I said it. So many times I bite my tongue… but I didn’t today.

I don’t think I pissed her off, but perhaps she will think ahead the next time she speaks to a random stranger. Maybe.

Only 7 days of BCP’s to go. Stims start next week.

24 thoughts on “Foot in Mouth

  1. Here from ICLW…Way to go! Whenever pregnant women say insensitive things to me, I just sulk and then hate them forever. Your assertiveness is way better than what I’ve been doing.Best of luck with IVF #1!

  2. I LOVE it. Hopefully, you’ve given her cause to think and realize that what she takes for granted, others find an almost insurmountable challenge. You rock.

  3. If she thought it was ok to bitch about being pregnant and fertile, why shouldn’t you feel free to do the same about your own circumstances?Some people are just ignorant. Maybe now she’s less so.

  4. Wow! I am impressed! If I had a nickel for everytime I wanted to say something like that to someone and haven’t…I do realize that it is all about perspective and many fertiles unfortunately just don’t have a clue as to what those of us struggling w/ IF go through. Not that ignorance is an excuse…Anyway, thank you for de-lurking on my blog this week w/ ICLW and your thoughts.

  5. OH, and I tried to add you to my reader, but it doesnt seem to pick up your posts! It is stuck on one that says you are a US citizen!Any ideas? Has anybody else had a hard time? I added you with your address, then tried again with your subscribe button…nada. Oh well, I will just have to keep checking in the old fashon way!

  6. I’m so glad you said something. Infertility needs to be talked about because heaven knows people need to hear it! Your schedule sounds very similar to mine. 6 bcps to go, then stims start on 7/31. Best of luck to you!

  7. Awesome. Just awesome! I too bite my tongue so much and then regret it once the moment passes. I think she needed to hear that. Maybe it will cause he to pause and think about the blessing she is carrying in her womb instead of seeing it as a “bother” that isn’t within her time schedule. Good for you! Sending you babydust for this cycle! (a visitor from ICLW)

  8. YES! I’m so glad you did. I’m sure it’s a pain for her but who among us wouldn’t love to be so burdened? Here lady…have a big dose of perspective.

  9. Good for you! Some people don’t realize that what they say can really hurt some people’s feelings. I have learned to be very careful about what I say to anyone about children. I often never bring it up. Here from ICLW!

  10. Excellent! I did that more than once myself. I just got so very sick of women who had an incredible gift (pregnancy and a soon-to-be-born baby) complaining about stuff like that. I hope it helps her to stop & think before talking out her bum like that!

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