I had a friend in high school who used to love to say, “The truest things are said in jest”. I guess it was kind of a personal motto for her, but like most teens, we picked up on the phrase and converted the word “jest” to stand for just about anything we could think of, because it was a funny word. Yes, “jest” was really a funny word in the 80’s. Keep laughing.

It morphed into…..”Surely you jest”…. and we would say it anytime the phrase “you’ve got to be kidding” or “are you serious” or “I can’t believe it” was called for.

I thought of this phrase when nurse T called me from my RE’s office yesterday.

Now, I haven’t been blogging much about my fertility status because I am in the worst rut. My miscarriage was 7 weeks ago, and STILL have not entered into my next cycle. Not even a whisper of AF, that bitch.

I feel like this summer has been all about the worst failed pregnancy in history.

So, anyway, feeling desperate, I called the RE on Tuesday because something just isn’t right. These last 7 weeks, my symptoms hardly changed. They dulled, but were still there. I still feel pg for pete’s sake.

After all of my previous miscarriages, I got AF 4 weeks later… give or take a day here or there. My HcG would drop like a lead sinker and AF would arrive in her glory.

But then again, I reminded myself that this was the exception to the rule of miscarriages. Let’s not forget my failed D&E, which led to my having to wait 6 EXCRUCIATING weeks for the natural miscarriage. Which was heinous in every way imaginable.

So I went in yesterday for an HcG check. And, Nurse T called me back (interrupting a riveting conversation with my Australian co-workers) and gave me the news.

My HcG is STILL registering at 30.

Surely you jest….!

Well, I guess that explains what’s going on. Sorta.

They want me back on Friday for a repeat beta. And another next week. Basically they intend to follow the number down until AF arrives, or I lose my mind.

or, if the number doesn’t trend downward…. well, that’s a discussion for another day.

Nurse T was as perky as could be, lamenting that “Shelli, you’ve been though so much, I am so sorry this is drawing out so long”.

I’m still trying to forgive her for what she said when I answered the phone. “I have the results of your pregnancy test.”

Pregnancy TEST? Are you flippin kidding me?????

I know she didn’t mean it that way… but still.

sigh