Is there such a thing as toddler delinquents?

I picked up David from preschool yesterday, and he mentioned in the car that his preschool friend, Sam (not his real name), was kicked out of school (his words).

“What do you mean, kicked out of school?” I said.

“Sam is a bad kid. His Mommy came to get him because he is always in trouble. And he’s not allowed to come back to play with us.”

So, this conversation is intriguing to me. One, because I have been in the company of Sam. To me he always seemed like a kid just wanting attention. But as I witnessed over the course of the last couple months, his behavior was pretty bad every time I’ve been in the same room (which is like 1/20th of the school day… imagine what its like the other 98% of the day).

He often would push David down in my presence, with no reason. My husband said that 9 times out of 10 when he picks up David, Sam would knock David’s lunchbox out of my husband’s hand for sport. If David reached for his coat hanging up under his cubby, Sam would body slam him.

Once I corrected Sam (a week or so ago), saying, “That’s not nice Sam, there is no reason to do that to David”. I’ve never done that before, but I felt like my son was Sam’s favorite punching bag… until I started talking to other parents and finding out that Sam’s target isn’t just us, it’s everyone and anyone.

I assume that the school picked up on this and the result is Sam is gone… for now. I don’t know the specifics.

It feels very odd to think that a 4 year old can be expelled from a preschool. I wonder how that conversation ensues…

…well, your kid is a blight on this classroom, so you are outta here…..?

Where do you go as a parent if you are told your child is out of hand? Does anyone follow up to ensure he gets assistance (if he needs it)?

It just seems so crazy to me.

And for my son, well, he has just been introduced to the ugly side of preschool. And, it won’t be the last time I fear.

4 thoughts on “Is there such a thing as toddler delinquents?

  1. I found your blog on and this was the post that was shown when showcasing your design (BTW, LOVE the design).Yes, there are preschool deliquents. Sadly, a few kiddos get the boot from my school every year. We try to tout the “this just isn’t the right environment for your child…” but often, well, nothing short of a padded cell is right. We always give them the number of a good pysch consult. It’s the crappier side of the job, that’s for sure.

  2. whether its a “the child needs more love at home” type situation or a “the kid has a emotional disorder that needs addressing” thing or “sam is just a bad ass undisciplined kid” thing…he’s gotta go if he’s gonna be a harm to other kids. i’d rather they remove the lil bugger than have him shove my kid off a 7 foot slide, but I’m just sayin’:)

  3. That’s a hard place to be in that’s for sure. While you don’t want to deny one child education and interaction that they need, you also don’t want the others picking up this type of behavior. Although how DO you handle this type of behavior? I think maybe the parents and child both need some type of professional help in this area, but who am I to say.

  4. You would hope someone would follow up. But sadly, it may not happen. I’m glad for your son that he will no longer be a punching bag. Though I do feel for the other boy, it sounds like he needs some help.

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